Surprise!

Yep. 

On a completely natural, medication-and-medical-intervention-free cycle without great timing. 

It's still extremely early--according to LMP I'm 4 weeks, 2 days. Estimated due date based on ovulation is October 30th (but, being all natural-health/future midwife/hippie, I'm well aware that that's a 'give or take two weeks' guesstimate). 

Right now, it doesn't really feel real. Well, I feel like hell, so that part feels real. I'm sleeeepy. And I can eat something, be fine for two hours, and then be ravenously hungry and nauseous and dizzy without any warning. So that's fun. 

My first beta was 256, and I go back in for another draw tomorrow, just to make sure they're doubling properly. My TSH was slightly elevated, so I'm on a thyroid medication. That scared me, only because it seems so early to already be having issues, even if it's a small and easily remedied issue. 

And I've only told a handful of people. Which is killing me. I told my two BFFs because they don't talk to any of my family. And I told two people at work, because if something goes wrong they're the people who will have to cover my shifts. I'm dying to tell my mom, but I'm trying to find a good way to surprise them in person. Because seriously, my family has been going through this just as much as I have. My poor mother has had to listen to me whine about every hot flash, blood draw, dildo-cam visit, and every other irritation along the way. My stepdad has been more optimistic for me than anyone else. So telling them over the phone just isn't going to cut it. 

My thought is that since this weekend is my stepdad's birthday, I'm going to either find or make a plaque/poster that says "The best dads get promoted to grandpa" to give to him. 

I'm still trying to figure out how to tell my dad and stepmom. I need to figure it out quickly, though, because if my brothers leak the information, they're going to get all butthurt that I didn't tell them sooner. And I don't want to deal with that. 

As for the rest of the world... I'm not sure yet. Part of me wants to announce early just because last time, we had no time to celebrate, and then I felt completely isolated when the loss was confirmed. But the other part of me wants to keep it to family only until way later--like somewhere in the middle of second trimester. 

So, if you know me IRL, DO NOT post anything on facebook. I promise, when we announce, I'm going to shout it from the rooftops. But for now, I really want it kept to a minimum.